We are not in hiding, we're just casuals, if you can find us maybe we can help!

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

I do not like green eggs and ham, I do not like them SCAM I am!

Can we get a little more creative, or at least ditch the broken English?  Like many of you, I receive daily SPAM about how my WoW account has been hacked and to "Click here" to confirm it is mine.  Here is one of the most common,

(I am cutting and pasting) (also I move my mouth away from the microphone to breath) (I love to state the obvious)

An investigation of your World of Warcraft account has found strong evidence that the account in question is being sold or traded. As you may not be aware of, this conflicts with Blizzard's EULA under section 4 Paragraph B which can be found here:
WoW -> Legal -> End User License Agreement
and Section 8 of the Terms of Use found here:
WoW -> Legal -> Terms of Use (they couldn't even put in the link, they just tell you where to click)

The investigation will be continued by Blizzard administration to determine the action to be taken against your account. If your account is found violating the EULA and Terms of Use, your account can, and will be suspended/closed/or terminated.

In order to keep this from occurring, you should immediately verify that you are the original owner of the account.

To verify your identity please visit the following webpage:
Insert some variation of a Blizzard site
and so on

These text only e-mails are so annoying and i wish i knew enough about computer sabotage to blow these bastards up. 
This is my absolute favorite, and visually it looks great, until you read it. 

What?!?! for you to lose the World of Warcraft account in order to recover OUR losses? I am sorry, can you promise me something more rare (rarer?) than a celestial steed.  I would click your link if you promised me, a flying moonkin mount or an exclusive vanity pet, say a mini Donkey Kong for the Alliance and Mini Bowser for the Horde!

Here, this is how you do it,
Go find someone who is fluent in Americanized English > pay them to draft a scam e-mail for you > SPAM SPAM SPAM > PROFIT!

Just be careful, don't open anything in these e-mails the chances you are getting a legitimate e-mail from blizzard are slim, in the 4+ years I have been playing the only e-mail I have ever received from them is the one telling me they have taken money from my bank account for my monthly subscription fee.
Get an authenticator!

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Mages PA-LEASE! (if ya got it flaunt it)

Real quick on class etiquette, and I pick on mages because it is fresh in my mind. I know most people PuG the weekly raid, groups form about every 8 minutes on my server. I also know that for most people these are facerolls, I have healed some of them using only my HoT (yes pallys have a HoT!), but that doesn’t mean we can forget the basics. I always toss out my buffs and discuss aura selections because that is my class’s ability, the druids usually toss out a paw, the shammy’s pop heroism and a cook will throw down a fish etc, etc … Now you charge in and demolish Patchwork, DE your loot annnd …

A. Hearth?
B. Walk out?
C. Log off?
D. The Mage tries to runs out and dies in slime!
E. The Mage throws up a PORTAL TO DAL!!!!

I don’t get mad if you don’t put out your table, or if the lock doesn’t summon me some candy, odds are we won’t need either of those in this run. But come on, you’re a MAGE, it’s the only useful port (thing) you have these days, we know you want to go back to Dalaran, so why not cast the group portal so we can all come with you? Oh noes that regent cost you a silver?

Ok I’m done being petty, please use your classes ability when you have the chance.


Tuesday, April 27, 2010


Scott Johnson made me go check out pugchecker and I realized something. I have stopped doing my random daily. I don’t really need the frost badges any more so why run them?

Recently I started a Horde Shammy, and because I am lazy (because I can); I am looking to get all the heirloom equipment for him. That means back into LFD to get more emblems. After getting HoL 2 times in a row, and visiting the site above, I realized why I stopped running these. I hate HoL, according to Pug Checker (which pulls from the armory) I have run it 29 times now. I had never run this instance due to a need for gear, so the only time I go there is because it was the old daily random or because now the LFD sent me there.

I get this instance by far the most of any, why Bliz why ?!?! you are killing LFD for me. The next closest are UK and VH, both of which I ran a bunch of when I first hit 80 because UK was the “easiest” and VH was right there in Dal so no need to travel anywhere (both pre 3.3). Along those lines I never once ran Occ before the LFD tool, since the release of 3.3 I have been thrown there 17 times?!

FoS,PoS, and HoR I ran a bunch on my own for gear, I almost never get those instances in LFD and they are supposedly the hardest ones. So what happened to gear determining where you go?  I know it depends on the others in your group, and putting higher geared with the undergeared.

Here is what I think, the three instances I have run the most since LFD came into existence are HoL, Occ, and DTK (boss kills for DTK are not accurate right now but I know I have been there a ton). The reason Bliz loves to send me here? They give more emblems? Only DPS and Tanks queue for these? Bliz hates me?  Oh, I know, Bliz said we will give all holy pallys the longest instance to run back in, and then give them a noob DK tank what isn't defence capped just so they can have a challenge! That’s all I got…

If any of my 8 readers have any thoughts or random musings for me, I am listening!


Monday, April 26, 2010

I have fallen to the Dark Side

So I was bored the other night and my buddy and I rolled hordies. I am taking on Shammy heals and he is going to go Bear tank, both Cows of course. Now I have a couple (many) thoughts on, well lots of things, so please excuse me as I ramble.

Maybe I am biased, from playing alliance for the past couple years, but I love to hear the Horde bitch and moan about the Alliance winning WG,… again! Especially when I was in that last battle whooping up on them!

Maybe I am biased, but Horde trade chat seems dumber, yes, dumber.

Maybe I am biased, but I think I am biased.

I am looking forward to checking out the world from the Hordes point of view before Cata destroys everything. I have never taken a Horde toon past level 20.

I did find a nice guild that reminds me a lot of my alliance guild, they are very helpful and willing to help run the lowbees thru old instances and help with group quest. So from this I am making the assumption that both sides have the same allure for great players coupled with lots of the stupid.

I need some GOLD!
When you start alts on the same server and the same faction as your main, you are blessed with gold, your guilds help (if you have one), trade goods, and equipment. Now Bliz has made it so you can send the BoA twink gear to any horde or alliance on your account, which is great for faster leveling and more survivability. But when your ONE bag fills up in the middle of a quest run and you are forced to delete much needed grays to keep that green, you get frustrated. Then I was faced with the dilemma of spending cash that I would use to get my next spells to get some 8 slot bags for 4 silver each. Ugh, half my cash for more bag space? WTH.

I could have went and begged for some gold, I could go visit the Chinese and buy some gold, or I could faction transfer another alt loaded with goodies, but then I remembered that I had something besides gear that was BoA. Wintergrasp Commendations! And what can we buy with Honor? That’s right! Epic Gems!

So I trade in some of my WG marks and gather up 5 of these to send to my baby Shammy. Then I wander Orgrimmar looking for the PVP jeweler vendor and purchase a Cardinal Ruby. Now to sell this baby and get some real bag space, … aaa crap, I need at least 75 silver to list this thing on the AH, so after 5 min of /trade WTS Cardinal Ruby for 100 gold (well under the AH asking price) I get my cash and some more spacious bags!

More on my horde adventures are to come.

Next post: HoL WTH!


Friday, April 23, 2010

Late to the party on a lot of things (I Dig a....)

The Pony, who cares. If you want one, go spend your cash on it. Having it does nothing to directly impact non RP game play. When and if the day comes where Bliz is selling armor, trinkets, or other stat/ability altering things, then i will start bitching about it. It’s your money, it’s your in game experience, do what you will.

Pally Cataclysm changes, well I don’t agree with some of the proposed changes, Bliz is in the early stages, these new abilities will change a lot before release. Just as LoH went from being not self castable to causing forbearance in 3.3 (I think) a lot of these proposals will change as we provide constructive feed back to the designers.

I will say that Beacon (bacon) causing your copied heal to cost you additional mana is probably not going to work as they described. Some of my heals I will want to copy, some I won’t, having to remove and reapply beacon during a fight as a mana conserving technique does not scream !FUN! to me. So Bliz if you’re listening, don’t make me spend a GCD or even an extra click on managing this ability, it would be a giant pain in my ass. That’s right; I’ll spend my 15 bucks somewhere else, like on booze and smokes. Then I suppose I will have to take legal action against you for causing my downward spiral into a drug educed coma that will result in me being an even larger burden on society. I know you don’t want to be responsible for that or deal with my lawyers, so go figure out something a little more clever, or face the wrath of my ambulance chasing law firm!!!

(Sorry if any of my 7 readers are ambulance chasing lawyers)

Vail !

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

I r a S.M.A.R.T. Holy Pally

I have run into a lot of new Holy Pallys as of late. They always seem to have lots of questions about who to heal, when to heal, how much and why they keep going OOM. I know what you’re thinking, “you’re a Pally you only have one spell just spam it on the tank already”

For the new Holy Pallys and in some cases other classes of healers, here is an overview on S.M.A.R.T. healing. It’s not hard, we just need to plan a little and think a little and it will become second nature in no time.

SMART Healing: What does this mean? It means find your space bar and learn to love it. It means get some situational awareness and boss knowledge stoked up. It means don’t think you can SPAM Holy Light for 8 minutes and not go OOM.

Break it down now!

   Situational awareness
   Mana managing
   Ability using
   Tank Healer

Situational awareness:
Know thy enemy, when you are progressing and leaning new fights you will have a learning curve for healing. For example the first time I fought Marrowgar, I was outside his hit box dodging his ice waves stopping to heal and hanging onto my pants when bone storm hit. I was using pots and saying little prayers to the pixel gods that my heal would land before the tank got squished. Fast forward to today. I stand behind the boss and melee back my mana in-between tank heals. When bone storm hits I pop devine plea and run to the corner of the room and wait for the tanks to pick him back up. I can spam HL the entire fight and still finish with full mana.

Mana managing:
Cool Downs are your friend, you have a lot of ways to regain your mana, Judgments, Melee+Seal of Wisdom, and Devine Plea are a few, you also have ways to save your mana, Sacred Shield, Beacon of light, Devine Illumination. Use them all even if you are not in dire need yet, be proactive in managing your mana just like you are with your heals. For example, when most boss fights start off you have a chance to use your DI cool down, most raid fights equal to your skill level will last long enough for you to use DI again right at the end when you are racing to down that boss before he eats your tasty bacon (tanks). Judge often for the chance to regain your 4% mana and go in and melee when you know the boss is not AoEing or posing a threat to your health, you can get a whack or two in in-between each HL cast and regen that mana.
I REALLY love lamp!
Ability using:
Sometimes the best time to use a cool down is when you don’t NEED to use it. When that bone storm goes off I use DP (Marrowgar), even if I have 85% mana left, that way if shit hits the fan and a healer goes down, I am ready to start picking up raid members who need heals. Use your abilities, and use them often, work Judgment into your rotation, plan your SS and BoL refreshes. If you know when damage will be soft you will know when you can safely refresh these buffs. Don’t forget about your hands, they are very powerful and often overlooked; yes I am talking about hand of freedom, protection etc. And for the lights sake, cleanse already, you can remove everything except for a curse with one spell, use it and save the mana from having to heal that person back up.

PreHeal, always have a heal in cast, if it is about to go off and your target (or beacon) does not need a heal, jump, /cancel, move, do whatever you like to do to cancel the cast. With HL taking so long to cast, especially when you are not geared in T10, you cannot afford to be a reactive healer. You must be a proactive healer, get that heal all warmed up, and if you don’t need it don’t cast it (Conserve Mana!). Have a heal already in cast when you see that boss casting his AoE spell. For example when you are in VoA and see a whiteout coming, get that Holy Light nuke warmed up to go off just after the AoE to take the tanks right back up to full. It will take a couple tries to get the timing down; once you do you will love laughing in the face of random boss001’s face!

Tank Healer:
Thanks to the Tanks! If you are new to a fight, stick to your assignment, if you are to keep Tank X and Y up, make sure they stay up before you venture off into healing the raid or even DPSing. Get a feeling for the damage coming in; learn when the fights change and when you can lay off the throttle a little bit. You are not always going to be a tank healer, the simple fact is that your beacon will almost always be on a tank or someone who is taking massive damage. You have the largest nuke heal in the game and have the ability to take most people from red to green in less than 1.5 seconds unfortunately you can only heal (significantly) two people at once with that big nuke.

Be SMART and you will be rewarded with boss kills and shineys (I cannot guarantee the droppage of the purples, sorry)


Thursday, April 1, 2010

I have done what I said I would not do

I have decided to become a hypocrite. So I have done what I said I would not do.
I have hired a new staff writer. Please welcome Gahzoo to the V-Team writing staff.

I was told that a monkey can write better than I can. So here is his first post.

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Happy Birthday